This time of year, we see advertisements for school supplies, pictures of the first day of school, and cars packed with a room worth of college gear and nervous new college students! What we don’t see, unless you look very closely, are the emotions of the parents, and especially the moms. Behind the smiles are fears, worry, anxiety, but also pride and joy. Whether is be off to preschool or graduate school or beyond, we always see our children as our “babies.” Along with that title is the assumed responsibility of their care and well-being. And no matter their age, that drive to attend to their care and well-being continues!
Of course there are extremes, those who over-protect and those who hover and the the “helicopter” parents. But most parents just love and care and want to provide a smooth ride for their children. Reality is that both the parents and the kids will go through some situations that are scary but if done well, we all learn from it. The parents can see their children ride through the storm and become more independent and self-assured. The kids see their parents are watching and are there for support, but are letting them master skills.
Both parent and child are learning. The loving presence is what builds confidence. As parents, with each new developmental stage (including post college!) our children go through, the best gift we can give is to trust in the seeds planted and allow your child to flourish, even is they stumble. Allow them to get back up. Your loving presence and attentive listening with be rewarded!
As parents, as you journey along your path, may you encourage your child, recognize your fears as a part of their developmental independence and all enjoy the adventure!